Pregnancy Journey and Daniel's Birth Story

We’ve wanted this sweet little boy for nearly 6 years. I remember distinctly having a conversation with Brad shortly after Evy’s second birthday. Brad was the one who brought it up and he felt like it was time for another baby. I was on the same page as far as wanting another baby. The only problem was that I had just started the previous month having pain all day everyday in my stomach. I was taking advil and tylenol to try to still function, but it was progressively getting worse. I couldn’t imagine have a baby growing inside with all the pain I was in. I said we could try for a baby after we figured out what was going on with my stomach.

Well, little did I know that was only the very beginning of a very long process to fix my stomach problems. It took 2 years of tests, procedures, medications, and eventually a trip to Mayo Clinic to get a diagnosis. It would take another 2 years to get my pain under control and get off all my medications that managed the problem. I finally felt ready to try for a baby. But then one day I was on a tall stool in our kitchen. The stool slipped from under me and I fell directly on my stomach on our countertop. That fall put me back at square one dealing with my stomach pain. I was so sad and angry at this new turn. I’d worked so hard to get ready to have a baby and be in a good place and here I was feeling like I was set back two years by my own accidental fall.

So I started again. I went back on the meds because I couldn’t control the pain otherwise. I kept up physical therapy and seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist. I did yoga everyday. Eventually my stomach stopped hurting so much so I went off the meds again. I should say that going off the meds is not a simple thing to do. It took me 9 months the first time and 6 months the second to get off the meds. You have to go really slow and even then the side effects are not fun. But I did it. Again. I wasn’t pain free, but I was ready to try for a baby. So 5 years after my chronic pain started, we tried for a baby.

Which brings us to this baby. I’ve felt so grateful and blessed to have this baby. It took so much work just to be ready to have him. And so much work to carry him. Miraculously, I didn’t have any of my chronic pain problems while I was carrying him. There were several things that kept me feeling pretty good this pregnancy including daily yoga, walks with the dog, going to physical therapy, and taking care of my mental health. Getting a little doggy who wanted to go on daily walks was super helpful in keeping me fit and my energy up. My physical therapist has also been amazing. I’ve had awful hip pain along with all the other regular pregnancy aches and pains and my physical therapist has kept my body going. And the daily yoga helped maintain what my physical therapist was able to do. I’ve never worked out this far into my pregnancy, but all told I felt pretty good until the end when I was just ready for this baby to come.

The night before my 38 week appointment, I started having contractions. Nothing with a consistent pattern, but they weren’t going away. It was late and I was so tired so I took a bath to ease them and went to bed early. I was up 5 times that night with contractions. After the morning rush and getting to my midwife appointment, my contractions were getting more consistent. My midwife checked me and I was at 3 cm, 60% effaced, -2 station. She could see I was having contractions and wondered if I was in early labor. We had also talked at my 37 week appointment about scheduling an elective induction at 39 weeks. She asked if I wanted to go ahead and schedule the induction if I looked to be in early labor. I said yes, I still wanted to schedule it since I’d had prodromal labor with Evy and this could be more of the same. For my mental health, I needed to know there was an end date whether I went into labor that day or if nothing happened. My midwife went ahead and scheduled it for a week later, right when I would hit 39 weeks. My midwife also offered to sneak me in for a quick appointment later that day to see if I was making any progress.

So I went home for a few hours. When I got home I was contracting about 5 minutes apart and by my 4 pm appointment I my contractions were more painful and about 3 1/2 minutes apart. It had been a long painful day. I was interested to see if this was actually something. Well at my appointment I’d only made it from 3 cm to 3 1/2 cm. She could tell there had been a change, but not much. She said it could be early labor or prodromal labor. She said if it did get worse that I could come into the hospital. If it was still prodromal labor there was a pain med they could give me at the hospital to ease my pain and let me sleep. She said that med usually either put people in full blown labor or their contractions would stop. I was glad to know that if I did have to go in to the hospital it wouldn’t be for nothing. I hated having to go in a second time to the hospital with prodromal labor with Evy since the staff made me feel like I was just making things up. So I went home with a plan, but by 9 pm my contractions stopped on their own.

So then for the next week nothing much happened. I had a few contractions on and off, but nothing more than that.

Then it was the day of my scheduled induction. I had to wake up early to call the hospital to make sure I should still come in for my induction. If they were too busy or had an emergency going on then they would delay the induction for another day. But luckily, they said they were ready for us! I let Brad know to go ahead and get ready. That day was also my 3 year mark of doing yoga everyday so I did do 10 minutes of yoga. I wasn’t sure if the baby was going to come before I made it to 3 years so it was kind of nice to hit that big milestone before having the baby. My sister had stayed the night to help in the morning with the kids. She made us breakfast and then we headed off to the hospital.

We checked in at the birth center, met our nurses, Maggie and Lisa, and got set up with a room. My midwife came in pretty soon after that and I had a cervical check to see where we were starting from. I was a 3, 70% effaced, and -1 station. My nurses went to go get some things set up so we took the opportunity while we were alone to have Brad give me a priesthood blessing. Brad’s always given me one when I go into labor and it’s so comforting to have that heavenly reassurance.

About 9:30 we went ahead and started the pitocin. The plan was to up my pitocin every 1/2 hour. My midwife recommended eating when I felt like it so we went ahead and ordered some food that morning though I didn’t want much then. After food, I spent some time on the yoga ball. The nurses taught Brad how to do some counterpressure on my back to help with the contractions which was pretty helpful. The pitocin started working pretty quickly. My nurse said I only needed a whiff of pitocin and my body was ready to have this baby!

It was about this time that we made some predictions. I guessed the baby would be 8lb 10oz. Brad said 8lb 4 oz. Brad asked the nurses when they thought this baby would be born. They thought they would probably get to see this baby born before they got off their shift at 7 pm.

By about 11:30 I was starting to feel nauseous. I had thrown up a ton with both of Nate and Evy so we wanted to stay ahead of that. The nurses went ahead and gave me some zofran. By 11:45 I was also getting in a good amount of pain, but we were also wanting to hold off a bit on the epidural to give the pitocin some time to work. So I got a dose of fentanyl. It was great. My body was able to relax and the pain eased a lot. In between the fentanyl and the zofran I was feeling pretty good again so we went ahead and had some lunch about 1. By about 2, I was starting to feel the contractions a lot again so I got a second dose of fentanyl. This dose didn’t do quite as much as the first dose, but I was more comfortable. I didn’t have fentanyl with Nate or Evy, but it was really nice to have that other option for pain control this time.

At 3, my midwife came back in. She wanted to see if she could get my contractions moving along so we did some hip releases. Basically I was laying on the very edge of the bed on my side and then my top leg was draped off the edge of the bed with my midwife and nurses helping me not fall off. We did that through 3 contractions on each side. I still had the fentanyl in my system, but those hip releases really hurt! It did exactly what the midwife wanted them to, intensify my contractions. After that I was ready for the epidural!

There was a bit of a hold up with getting the anesthesiologist up to my room, but he got there around 4. He did a great job and got in the epidural pretty quick. Brad was great to hold me while I got the epidural. The worst part was getting the numbing medication, but the catheter wasn’t too bad. The only problem with the epidural was that I got super cold and was shaking. My sweet nurse told me a trick she learned from a midwife to stick out your tongue with the shakes to get them to go away. That worked pretty well actually! None of us were quite sure why it works, but it did help control the shaking.

Time for another cervical check and I was 5-6 cm, 0 station. My midwife gave me the option to just see how I did with the epidural or we could go ahead and break my water to get things going faster. I wasn’t sure what I wanted yet, so we got me set up with a peanut ball and everyone left the room. Brad and I got some time to talk on our own. Brad was pretty surprised I hadn’t jumped at the opportunity to move this labor forward and get to met baby sooner. So after talking it over we were ready to have my water broken. We called back in the midwife and she broke my water about 5. There wasn’t a lot of fluid, but there was some meconium in the water. The baby didn’t like the change though. We did a lot of position changes and backed off the pitocin to try and make him more comfy. Eventually my midwife decided to do an amnioinfusion (basically adding back in some fluid to help cushion the baby.) It took about an hour, but the baby looked better with more fluid.

It was starting to creep closer to 7 and our wonderful nurses would be leaving. They had been so sweet all day and I was hoping they would get to see me through to the end. About 6:45, I was starting to struggle again with the contractions and feeling some pressure. The nurse called for the midwife to come check me and sure enough I was 10 cm and my body was wanting to push this baby out. My midwife asked what position I wanted to be in and I said I was happy with whatever would keep the baby happiest. He seemed to like me laying on my back best for his heart rate dips so that’s what we tried. So at 6:54 I started pushing. Brad is such an amazing help when I’m pushing. His awe and encouraging words help me so much. He was holding me and just so amazed at seeing his son being born. It didn’t take too long to get him here. When the baby’s head was born, he had his hand up by his face. The midwife helped pull baby’s arm out and then the rest of the baby was born. Daniel James Packer was born at 7:01pm, 7 minutes after I started pushing. Daniel got to come for skin to skin right away. He was screaming and I was bawling. I could hardly believe he was here and healthy. I’d wanted this baby for so so so long. I was so happy and I cried for so long. Brad said he felt the Spirit so strong when Daniel was born. We were able to just soak him in, just the 3 of us. It was so nice that the nurses let us have that time together.

I’d been pretty worried I’d have problems with placenta detatching like I did with Evy, but luckily it came out no problem. Danny’s birth was pretty different than Nate or Evy’s. It was so nice to have the induction and be ready for a specific day. I didn’t throw up once with Danny, but I threw up a lot with Nate and Evy. I also didn’t have any tears with Danny, but I did with Evy and Nate. Nate I pushed for 30 minutes, 20 with Evy, and Danny was 7 minutes.  It was by far the easiest delivery of the 3. Nate and Evy were born in the middle of the night and Danny was born during the evening so I was a lot less tired by the end of it.

I was so happy my wonderful nurses got to see Daniel being born before they left their shift. They stayed for awhile after and helped with newborn assessments. He was 8 lbs even and 21 inches long. And luckily he didn’t have any issues with the meconium. Brad was once again the closest on the baby’s size. He’s won every time!

It was after birth that we finalized what we wanted his name to be. Daniel was the name we talked about for a baby boy when we were dating and have always loved. We thought about that name for Nate, but it didn’t feel right for him. But it fits our Danny. James is after my grandpa. He even looks a bit like him.

We’re so happy that little Daniel is here! He’s been such an angel baby and has the sweetest temperament. He’s been eating and sleeping like a champ. I’m just loving soaking up all the baby smells, noises and snuggles. I’ve waited so long, I’m soaking up as much of this sweet little Danny boy as I can.

Welcome to the World

Daniel James Packer

October 26, 2022 at 7:01 pm

8 lbs, 21 inches

Evelyn's Birth Story

Evelyn's birth was very different from Nathan's.  I don't know what I'll expect next time around since they were completely different experiences.  Even though it was such a different experience, the end result of finally being able to hold my baby made it all worth it.

With Nathan, he came the day before his due date.  We wanted my mom to be here to take care of Nathan when I went into labor so that he could be at home and with someone he is very comfortable with.  We decided that we would have my mom come a few days before my due date so we could get her settled in and familiar with Nathan's schedule before we would likely be gone at the hospital.  My mom arrived late Sunday night and Nathan was so excited to see grandma on Monday morning.  My mom was such an amazing help after Nathan arrived that I was so happy that she could come be with us again.

On Tuesday I woke up feeling a bit nauseous and having contractions.  They were pretty far apart, about every 8 or so minutes.  We had our special instructor come work with Nathan that morning, but as the morning progressed and my contractions kept coming I decided to cancel our ABA therapy.  I'm glad I did because my contractions continued to get closer and more intense.  They weren't super painful yet.  Before Brad had left for school that day he knew I had been having contractions so he had his phone close to him all morning for updates.  Around 11:30 my contractions hit 5 minutes apart.  I let Brad know so he could make other arrangements for his patients.  We both thought we'd have a baby that day with how things were progressing.

I had to wait an hour before calling my OB once they hit 5 minutes apart and by the end of the hour they were 4 minutes apart and getting more painful and intense. I called and my OB told me to come on in, especially since this was my second baby.  My mom drove me in to the hospital and Brad met me there since he was only 8 blocks away at the dental school.  Once at the hospital, Brad took me upstairs to the PEC and we got checked in.  They set me up on the monitors and by this time I was contracting at 3 minutes apart and they were going off the monitoring chart.  They checked me and I was only at a 2.  I was really bummed.  I had been a 2 at my previous week's OB appointment.  While the nurse was out of the room, Brad took the time to give me a priesthood blessing. I remember in the blessing that she would be healthy when she came and that my labor would be as Heavenly Father wanted it to be.

Since they could see I was having contractions they had me walk for an hour around labor and delivery.  I was starting to get in quite a bit of pain so I was really hoping I would dilate.  After an hour they checked me again and I was still at a 2.  I was very disappointed.  They decided to discharge me to labor at home for awhile.  Since I was already contracting at 3 minutes apart they told me to come back in when the pain was unbearable or my water broke.

We got home about 5 and my mom had dinner for us (I was starving.)  I continued to walk and also spend some time on our exercise ball.  After another 5 hours of contractions at 3 minutes apart I was in a lot of pain.  I decided it was time to go back in to be checked.  We drove in to the hospital and were checked in at 11.  They gave me another exam.  The monitors showed my contractions were slowing down.  They checked me and I was still at a 2. I was so close to crying right then and there.  I waited until we got to the car before I started crying.  I was so frustrated and embarrassed and sad I wasn't going to be having my baby.  I had been contracting for 18 hours and it did no good.  I had every hope of my body being able to put itself into labor and delivering a baby and it felt like I wasn't able to do that.  We went home and went to bed.

The next day was Wednesday, my due date.  Nothing happened.  No contractions. Nothing.

By Thursday I was pretty miserable.  I just wanted my baby to come and I was starting to stress that my mom would have to leave before baby girl had made her entrance.  I wasn't too hopeful of any great change when I went to my weekly appointment with my OB that day.  I was able to see one of my favorite OBs at the practice.  We talked about an induction date right off.  The soonest available she had for an induction was February 14th, Valentine's Day.  I wasn't opposed to a Valentine's baby and the baby would share my grandfather's birthday.  I just wanted her here as soon as possible.  Brad wasn't so convinced, but he wasn't about to tell me to wait even longer for this baby.  I was checked and my midwife was surprised with how low the baby was and I was at a 3!  At least that was progress!  The midwife decided to strip my membranes and once she was done I was at a 4.  If I could start contracting I would be far enough along to get admitted!  It gave me just a little bit of hope that I might not need an induction and be able to go into labor by myself.  For the rest of the day I had inconsistent contractions.  I tried walking to help things along, but every time I sat down they would stop.

On Friday I started to have some contractions mid morning.  They stayed about 7-8 minutes apart all morning.  After lunch my contractions started to get closer together and get more intense.  By 2 they had hit 4-5 minutes apart, but I wanted to be sure that these were very consistent and more intense before I went to get checked again.  By 3:30 they had been 3 minutes apart for awhile so I called my OB to let them know we were coming in.  We took our time getting out to the car and getting things ready to go.  I really didn't want to be sent home again so I wanted to make sure I was far enough along that they wouldn't.  We got to the PEC at 5 and I was checked.  I was a little surprised when the nurse said I was a 3.5.  They wanted to watch me for an hour and have me rechecked.  I was a little frustrated because the monitor wasn't picking up my contractions (but they were there! and hurt too!) I didn't want them thinking I was "faking" labor again (but I had been faking before, the monitors had shown on Tuesday I had been contracting every 3 minutes.)  Brad and I didn't say anything then, but we thought there was a good chance they would send us home.  We were both so excited when they checked me again and I was a 4.5!  I could stay!  We were definitely going to have this baby!

We headed over to our labor and delivery room.  It was the room right next to where we had Nathan and it has a phenomenal view of downtown Philly.  We got settled in and the nurse came in and did a whole history on me while we were waiting for the anesthesiologist.  My goal was to get the epidural before I got in so much pain that I started throwing up like I did with Nathan.  The anesthesiologist made it to our room about 8:30 and got me set up.  I was so glad they let Brad stay this time.  With Nathan they had told us they had a rule that they wouldn't let dad's stay during the epidural because too many of them would pass out.  No one was worried that Brad would faint.  He's seen far worse than an epidural at dental school.  The epidural worked great.  I could still move my legs on my own and it took away the pain.

About 15 minutes after they had the epidural in the doctor came in for a check.  I was at a 5.5 and so we decided to break my water to get things moving along faster.  I started to feel like I was going to pass out almost immediately after they did this.  I'm very familiar with how my body reacts when it's going to pass out so I noticed the signs that I might.  I got really nauseous.  Then my hearing started to go.  When my hearing started going the nurse told me to start some deep breathing to prevent me from passing out.  After a few minutes of this I started to get better and the feeling I was going to pass out went away.

Brad and I knew it was going to be a long night so we decided to get as much sleep as we could.  We both napped when there wasn't nurses or doctors coming in to check on me. They did another check right around midnight.  I was at a 7.  Around 1 am, I started to have a lot of pain.  My perfect epidural wasn't enough for the painful contractions of transition.  We had the anesthesiologist come in and give me some more medication.  It worked great, but I couldn't move my legs at all.  I was getting pretty worried that my epidural was going to stop working and I was going to have to go through all the pain of childbirth so the trade off of not being able to move my legs was a good one.

My team came in at 2 since baby's heart rate was dipping with my contractions.  They did a check and I was at a 10!  It was time to get this baby here.  It was nice not having such a full house this time.  Nathan's delivery included 11 people.  This time we just had 6.  I could feel more of the pressure of the contractions this time versus last time which was helpful with the pushing.  I pushed for about 20 minutes.  Brad was phenomenal at coaching me through and giving me encouragement.  It always helps me so much to have his excitement to help me through that last little bit.  Just as she was crowning the doctor remarked that he saw a lot of hair on baby's head.  I was wanting her to have some hair so it only made me even more excited to meet this little girl.  At 2:32 am, Evelyn Claire Packer arrived in the world and let everyone know.  She wouldn't stop screaming for the longest time.  We got to do skin to skin right away and just look at sweet Evelyn.

They did have a problem with the placenta not removing.  It didn't detach on it's own and so the doctor had to go in to manually remove it.  The placenta was located at the very top of my uterus and the doctor couldn't pull it off.  They brought in an ultrasound machine to help the doctor with the removal, but they were still having a hard time getting it to detach.  Brad said it was crazy watching the ultrasound because he could see the doctor's whole hand trying to yank out the placenta.  Brad and I both were pretty worried that I would end up in the OR to get it out.  With a switch of doctors trying they finally got it out.  Thank goodness for the epidural because they were doing a lot of pulling to get the placenta out.

Recovery has been a lot easier this time. I only had one small tear.  With Nathan I had a couple and they were worse tears.  I'm feeling pretty good all things considered. I'm able to get around a lot easier which I'm so grateful for with a toddler to run after.

We're so happy that she's here.  She's a sweet little baby and has tolerated her brother antics wonderfully.   Nathan has been pretty sweet with baby Evy.  If she's crying he'll tell her, "It's ok Evy."  He really likes giving her hi 5s and will sometimes kiss her head.  I love those moments when she's awake and just taking everything in and we just stare at each other.  She had one night while we were in the hospital were I seriously wondered if I would every sleep again.  I think I got an hour of sleep the whole night.  Luckily she's starting to get this whole day and night thing figured out and is sleeping longer stretches at night. Brad is so in love with her.  I love seeing how he takes such good care of her.  All in all, we're just so happy that she's here and joined our family.  We're very blessed.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star Shower

These wonderful ladies threw me a baby shower for baby girl.  It turned out so cute and it was a lot of fun to get together with friends.  I'm feeling a lot more prepared for baby girl to come.  Thanks ladies!  

Life Right Now

Brad's looking into residency programs which is so exciting.  And stressful.  And nerve racking.  But also totally awesome!  Brad has applied to lots of programs in Pennsylvania, Minnesota, Colorado, and Utah.  And he's already had 4 interviews which is great.  He's got several more lined up as well in the coming weeks.   In all he's had 7 offers for interviews! All of these residencies are in the match program.  Basically we rank our favorites, the programs list there favorite candidates, magic happens, and then we get told which program we will be going to.  We get no final say other than ranking our programs.  Crazy!

Nathan is doing awesome!  We just got his 6 month report from ABA and Nathan is now up to 140 spontaneous words which is awesome.  6 months ago Nathan only had maybe 10-15 words, most of them were imitative (we said them first and he repeated.)  He's also doing better with his sensory problems.  He does a lot better with different textures and he is eating a lot more because of his progress.  We also had Nathan's 6 month follow-up appointment at developmental pediatrics (where Nathan was diagnosed with autism.)  The nurse practitioner we saw was on the evaluation panel when Nathan was diagnosed and she was so pleased to see the progress that Nathan has made it the last few months.  She was so happy that we were able to get so many therapy hours through Early Intervention and she could see what a difference it has made for Nathan.

Nathan working hard at therapy

I have official made it into my third trimester.  Only 9 more weeks!  Which freaks me out a little bit with all I need to do to get ready.  And then I try to remind myself that 9 weeks is still 2 months and I have time.  I'm feeling good and still have energy which is great with trying to keep up with Nathan.

I've been in full on crafting mode for baby girl.  Quilt #1 is all pieced together and has been sent to Utah to be quilted.  I have this crazy idea that I want 2 quilts for baby girl (I couldn't decide on just one design and Nathan had 2 quilts,) but the second quilt is much more time intensive than the first.  But I'm really really excited about it so hopefully that will motivate me with all the hand appliqué I will be doing.  I just finished baby girl's mobile and I am seriously in love with it.  Love, love, love.  I also found some fabric online that is the perfect fabric for baby girl's nursery.  Two shades of pink, green, and yellow, the exact colors I wanted.  The fabric is from one of my favorite fabric designers.  I found it for 60% off and so I ordered enough to make crib sheets out of it.  I was beyond excited when I ordered the fabric, which Brad just didn't understand.  He looked at me like a was a little crazy.  I mean, it's designer fabric that is perfect for baby girl's nursery.  What's not to be excited about?   I'm also mostly done with a knitted blanket and partially through a baby bonnet to go with baby girl's blessing dress.  I think it's time I start completing a few projects.

Quilt 1

Quilt 2 - That's 120 individual "leaves" to be hand quilted.

Designer fabric for crib sheets

So that's life right now.  It's a little daunting to think how much life is going to change over the next couple of months.  Brad will have matched with a program and we'll be planning a move.  I'm looking into some new programs for Nathan that would start in the New Year.  And we'll have a new baby in February.  There are lots of exciting and wonderful things to come.

Baby Gurl

We started asking Nathan a few days before our ultrasound if he would like a baby girl or a baby boy.  He's never changed his mind.  It's a, "Baby Gurl."  Looks like he was right.  We're having a baby girl!  We're so excited!  We've all been feeling like it was a little girl so everyone is happy.

While we were having the ultrasound the ultrasound tech was having a hard time getting baby girl to cooperate.  She had the doctor do some more searching.  The doctor asked us if we were feeling like it was going to be a boy or a girl and we said that we were feeling like it was a girl.  The doctor finally got a decent shot and said, "Well, I think it's a girl."

"Really?!?" I blurted out.

"I wouldn't say that unless I was mostly sure.  That would be pretty mean otherwise.  I'm 90% sure it's a girl."  Haha, thanks doc.

I went out and celebrated with some shopping.  I went to get just her first outfit and came back with way more.  Everything was so cute.  And I had to keep looking because I needed to find a dress.  I'm so excited to start decorating the nursery, making quilts, and knitting little things for baby girl.  It's also exciting to think about getting Nathan's big boy room ready for him as well.  It's a good thing we're going into winter and more time at home so I'll have time for all the projects.  Now, we need to think of a name for baby girl!

We Have Something to Tell You

"What?!?  Really!?!"

Nathan's going to be a big brother!  We're are so excited for our new little addition arriving early February.  For now my due date is February 4th.

I've been feeling pretty good.  I honestly can't complain after how bad Nathan's first trimester was.  With Nathan I got really sick with an infection that was like having food poisoning for a month at the peak of morning sickness.  This time around my only goal has been to not throw up while I had a therapist at home working with Nathan and I'm proud to say I accomplished my goal.  My only complaint is that morning sickness has lasted longer than it did with Nathan.  I'm still nauseous, but it's been getting better lately so hopefully it will go away completely.

And we can't wait to know if it's a boy or a girl. We could know as early as this Thursday when I go in for another OB appointment otherwise we'll probably know in about a month.  We're both hoping/feeling it's a girl, but we'd be very happy for Nathan to have a little brother as well.

We honestly couldn't be more happy to be having baby #2. We're a little nervous to see how Nathan does with the transition, but he loves babies so hopefully he'll be a great big brother.  It gives me butterflies to think we'll be a family of 4 in February, but we're excited for this new adventure.

Birthday Story

Just so you know, this has all the details so read at your own discretion.  But for me to remember, here it is.

On Wednesday I wasn't feeling so hot so I basically cancelled all my plans for the day.  I slept and mostly laid around in bed all day.  I was having a few contractions, but nothing consistent or very strong.  The one productive thing I did do was help Brad make fajitas for dinner.  Brad had a question about the fajita meat and was on the phone with his mom as we were sitting down to eat.  I had just taken my second bite of fajita when I started to feel wet.  At first it was just a little bit, but then it was increasing.  Brad says that at this point my face was hilarious.  I told Brad I thought my water was breaking and ran upstairs to the bathroom.  I could hear Brad telling his mom that my water just broke and hanging up the phone.  I didn't quite make it to the bathroom before it all came gushing out.  As I was cleaning up I realized that this wasn't the nice, clear liquid they had talked about in child birth classes.  This was brownish yellow brown, meaning the baby had pooped.  I called my OB office around 5:30 pm and they said to come right in to the hospital.  We were quite the sight to see running around trying to gather our last few things as I was starting to have some contractions.

But soon enough we were at the hospital.  Brad dropped me off at the ER and I got checked in.  By the time I was wheeled up to the PEC (basically the ER for preggos) Brad was up there meeting me.  There were several other people in line to be seen, but they sent me right back to be evaluated.  This is when I had another huge gush of liquid.  They had to check that for sure my water had broken and it didn't take the nurse the usual sample for the slide for her determine that it really was amniotic fluid.  They checked me and I was dilated to a 3.  The previous week at my OB appointment I was almost a 2.  A 3 is not officially "active" labor, but since my water had broken and there was baby poop in it they decided to induce me and get this baby here sooner than later.  They said that even though the water breaking can start labor, it can also take days to really get going.  Seeing as there is an increased risk for problems for me and baby by waiting, we were going to start right on the pitocin.  The doctor took a guess and said that he thought this baby would be born in the late morning or early afternoon.  Brad and I also took the time to make a few predictions of our own.  Brad said he would be born at 4 am and would weight 6 lbs, 8 oz.  I thought he would be born at 4 pm and his weight would be in the low 7s.

However, there wasn't enough rooms that night in Labor and Delivery.  I was examined in the PEC at 7:00, told I would be admitted at 8:00, but didn't get to my room until 10:00.  By that time I was having some decent contractions of my own.  The anesthesiologist came by and had me sign the permission forms for the epidural so when the time came we wouldn't have to worry about paperwork.  They got me settled in and by 10:30 I was in enough pain to ask for the epidural.  Unfortunately, the anesthesiologist had 2 back to back c-sections right then.  I didn't see him until 12:00.  Next time, we're not waiting.  Right before midnight they also decided to start me on the pitocin.  So, not only did I have my own contractions, but they added to them with the pitocin.  I was not happy at all.  I was vomitting with a lot of the contractions and feeling very sick.  I was in agony waiting for that epidural.

Originally I had some fears about having an epidural placed.  It wasn't as easy and as pain free as they make it sound, but it was so worth the little bit of discomfort.  The anesthesiologist became my favorite person of the night.  The epidural was magic.  I could feel the pressure, but none of the pain.  He was also nice enough to wait during the contractions before doing anything.

After letting that work they decided to come in and check me at about 1:00.  I had progressed to a 5.  The doctors felt great about this.  They had me lay back and try to get as much rest as I could.  However, twenty minutes later I had the doctor back in because the baby's heart rate was dipping too much with my contractions.  They did another check and I was at a 7.  They decided to try changing my position to see if this would help baby's heart rate.

But after another twenty or so minutes (around 2 am) the doctors were back in.  The position change hadn't really helped so they decided to put in a catheter and add back in amniotic fluid to help cushion the baby.  This ended up really helping baby, but made me feel very light headed.  My hearing started to go.  For me, this means, I'm about to pass out.  I let them know this and quickly they had the anesthesiologist and another doctor there.  They took me off the epidural, which I was not happy about.  They repositioned me and after a minute or two my hearing returned and thankful so did my epidural. While they were up there anyways, they did another check.  They said I was an 8 or a 9.  This baby was coming quick.  They told me to rest up and they would be back in a couple hours to check me and see if baby would be ready to come.

It was about this time that Brad and I decided on our baby's full name.  We had his first name picked out for months, but still had 4 options for his middle name.  When it came down to it in that moment, we knew which one we liked most.

I could still feel the pressure of my contractions so I didn't really fall asleep except for maybe a half an hour to an hour.  About 4 am the doctor came back in to check me.  I could really feel baby down low already so I wasn't surprised when she said that I was a 10 and he was right there.  It was time to push and this is when the entourage started showing up.  My doctor was accompanied by a resident.  I had two nurses who had been helping me all night.  There was another doctor to help with the delivery.  Since baby had pooped in utero, they had 3 pediatricians in the room to evaluate him as soon as he came out.  There were someone else in there too (Brad said he counted 11 people including us), but I didn't really care about anyone except Brad, my doctor, and my wonderful nurse.  I pushed for about 30 minutes (now I know why it's called labor.)  Usually they do sets of three, for a count of ten.  For the finale, I did a set of 5, for what seemed like extra long counts of 10.  I had been closing my eyes while I was pushing, but someone (I can't even recall who) told me to look and sure enough Nathan David Packer was born.  I remember thinking 1. he didn't look to bad for just coming out (I would even venture kind of cute) and 2. he had hair.  They let Brad cut the cord and then took him to be evaluated in the corner of the room by the pediatricians.  I was a little sad that they had to whisk him off and that I didn't get to immediately hold and just look at my baby.  I could hear him crying in the corner and I was crying.  Our little boy had made it.  He was here.  My eyes were focused on that little corner even though I couldn't see a thing with all the people surrounding little Nathan.

Which was a good thing.  We had opted to have Nathan's cord blood publicly donated and so the doctors were drawing the blood from the cord right after Nathan was born.  This was followed by the delivery of the placenta and then repairing two tears from delivery.  The doctors told me that the one was a Level 2 tear and the other was a Level 1.  I'm glad I didn't focus too much on this because it was not pleasant.  But thank goodness for that epidural.

It took them an hour to evaluate Nathan.  They did keep me updated with how he was doing.  Nathan didn't swallow any of the baby poop in the amniotic fluid which was a good thing.  The one scary thing was that one of his arms came out completely white when he was born.  It must have been pinched on the way out.  It took a long time for the color to return to his arm.  They did weigh him at that time.  He weighed 6 lbs, 10 oz.  So, Brad won both of our bets.

Finally, I was able to hold my baby.  He was perfect.  He was so awake when I held him.  His eyes are blue and they were so intent to see me and Brad.  He really could tell who both of us were.  It was so sweet.  Here was our little miracle baby.  He had made it.  And he was ours and perfect and we love him beyond anything.

I do have to say that Brad was the most amazing support to me.  He held me, comforted me, massaged me, did everything I asked him.  He was amazing in what he had to say to me to keep me going.  He was so excited during delivery.  He kept saying "Oh wow,", "You're doing it!", "You're doing awesome," and "I love you" all the time.  Once Nathan was born Brad kept me updated about what was happening to Nathan and would bring over his camera to show me pictures of our little boy that I couldn't see.  He was wonderful.  I couldn't ask for a better husband and he is the most amazing father to Nathan.  Brad is absolutely smitten and he definitely has a way with that little boy.  For all of this, I am so very grateful and blessed.

So for now, we are enjoying having our sweet little boy home with us.  He's doing great and is such a wonderful baby.  He's slept so peacefully and hardly cried.  He's a good little eater (he actually gained weight while we were in the hospital.)  And every so often he'll have that wonderful alert state where he will just look at us.  I'm still recuperating and sore, but it's totally worth it to have our sweet little baby.

Getting Ready

I've had about 5 bazillion things on my "To Do" list to finish before the baby gets here.  It feels like whenever I get done with one thing there is about 10 more things to fill its place.  I'll blame it mostly on being in the new house and having so much to do to get settled.  I think I've got the most important things out of the way at least.  To keep myself from going crazy with cleaning and organizing, I've had a few fun projects as well.

Like making a car seat cover.  I made it reversible depending if I want more stripes or polka dots.

And some burp cloths.

And 15 freezer meals.  While some people may not consider cooking as a "fun" project, I generally like cooking.  There is something so satisfying about seeing all this food neatly organized in the freezer.

Sometime soon I'll have pictures of my favorite project, the nursery, but I've got one or two more things to finish.  But I'm loving how it's turning out.  I hope baby boy will like it too.

Grateful

I don't like to complain.  I find it annoying sometimes when people are just complaining.  I'm talking about more than just having a hard day or life being difficult.  I'm talking about people who just have nothing good to say and have to complain about it all the time.  I mentally try to keep myself away from it.

Except the last few weeks.  Life has not been working out the way its supposed to.  Add pregnancy hormones.  Oh poor, poor Brad.  He sure has put up with a lot of my complaining even though school has been horribly rough on him the last little bit.  And not just to Brad.  I find myself just complaining to myself.

Well, finally things have been working out for us.  There was one day this week when I literally found myself counting my blessings that have come into our lives in the past few weeks.  Can I tell about the wonderful things that have happened that I am so incredibly grateful for?

About a month ago I woke up with the worst back ache and have been dealing with the pain for weeks.  The baby was turning to be head down, but as he was doing so he was pinching a nerve in my back.  Finally a couple of weeks ago the baby has found a happy spot and I am pain free.  And I am so grateful for so many reasons.  One, this baby isn't breech, which is one less thing to worry about.  Also, there are so many people who deal with chronic pain.  My dad has had back problems for years before he got back surgery.  Still not fixed, but better.  And he doesn't ever complain about it.  And I know that there are a lot of women out there who would say, "I would take your pain for the entire 9 months, if only I could have a baby."  I have a wonderful and amazing friend, Shelley.  Her experiences with losing her angel baby Luke have impacted how I react to this pregnancy so much.  I am so incredibly blessed to be having this baby.  He's made it plenty clear that he's supposed to be in our family right now.  He's been quite the fighter with all that he's been through.  For that, I am grateful everyday that my baby is still healthy and alive.

Going along with baby getting ready to come, I've had this nagging worry about not being ready for this baby.  Not in a am-I-going-to-be-a-good-parent sort of way, but in a we-need-so-many-things-for-this-baby sort of a way.  Well, I was finally able to find a good crib and dresser on Craigslist and some friends in our ward supplied a truck so that we could pick them up.  I had some wonderful friends throw me a baby shower and received so many wonderful gifts.  I've also been picking up things here and there as they have been going on sale so I'm slowly getting the things that we need.  I'm feeling a lot better about being ready for this baby.

I also had a pressing need to get a Dr.'s appointment (nothing scary, just a prescription refill), but since I was a new patient at this office they were already booked out 1 to 2 months.  I had enough pills to last me a few weeks, but I would definitely run out of my prescription before getting in.  But I was lucky enough to call right after someone cancelled and was able to get for 3 days later (I think the excuse that I'm pregnant and really can't go without the medication also helped.)  Just a little blessing that helped out a lot.

I've also been in a little bit negative about living in Philadelphia.  Ok, a lot negative.  I know our experience here hasn't been typical, but it has been our experience.  But you know the one thing I really, really love about Philadelphia?  We have the best friends out here.  Wonderful, amazing friends.  Friends who have helped us out a lot this year.  Lately we've been doing a lot of things with our friends like General Conference, Easter, and Rocky night.  I love our wonderful friends.

Brad hasn't been having it easy either.  He's been incredibly busy with school.  He's been putting in a bunch of extra hours in the evening at school.  And it's just so, so tough.  With all this going on though, Brad has still been trying so hard to find time to be with me and to take care of me.  He's so wonderful to me.

Finally, we've been dealing with the ever annoying housing search.  I think I hate it almost as much as job searching.   It's lasted about as long as a job search too.  And recently it's been getting to me more than ever.  We really, really want to be in a new place before the baby comes.  And it's been stressing me out because we have been running out of time.  But after months of searching, we've found a place.   We're going to be able to move before the baby is here.  And I LOVE the house we have found.  It's a twin home in a quiet suburb.  The landlord is completely renovating the whole home.  New windows, new electric wiring, new insulation, new kitchen, refinished hardwood floors, new paint, washer, dryer, dishwasher, storage, walk in closet in the master, parking.  It even has 3 bedrooms so baby can have his room and still have room for family and friends to come visit/be Brad's study.  There is even a little backyard with a pink flowering dogwood tree.

Moving also means we needed to help get our current place leased out.  After posting it on Craigslist, we had someone see the place, apply, get credit approved, and sign a lease in just 5 days after posting it.  5.  We couldn't ask for a better situation to work out.

I know most of these things are pretty small.  But I've just felt so overwhelmingly blessed these past few weeks.  I guess things do work out in the end.

Baby Shower

A couple of my lovely friends threw me a wonderful baby shower.  It was perfect.  Lots of friends, delicious food, and some adorable baby gifts.  Thank you so much Holly and Nettie!

Baby Shower

My mother and sisters threw me a fabulous baby shower while I was in Utah.  They did a lot of work and it turned out beautifully.

It was so wonderful to see so many friends and family there.  We received so many wonderful gifts for the baby.  I got some things off my registry and some very cute clothes.  Thank you everyone!  Also, thanks Mom, Malinda, and Adrianne for such a wonderful baby shower!